Are You Talking to Me? Addressing the Reader

By Janice Hardy, @Janice_Hardy

It's not always a good idea for your novel to talk back to readers. 

In most stories the narrator is telling the story to an ambiguous “someone.” The fourth wall (the reader) is never broken and everything happens as if no one was watching, just like TV.

But sometimes narrators break that wall and speak directly to the reader. Done well, it can make the reader feel as if they’re listening to a story by a good friend. Done poorly, it jars the reader out of the story and reminds them they’re reading a story.

When you think about it, all first person stories are talking to the reader. The narrator is saying “I did this I did that,” so sometimes you can have sentences that feel like the narrator is addressing the reader when they’re actually not. The comments are more like rhetorical questions or musing to oneself.

It wasn’t like they’d shoot me for it, right?

This is fairly common in first person, so it’s not technically speaking directly to the reader. The "right?" could just as easily be the narrator trying to reassure themselves.

But other times, the internal comment is absolutely directed at the reader:

So listen, you know how it gets when you're flying down a hill in a giant barrel with no way to steer? It was like that.

This isn't dialogue aimed at a character, it's an internal thought meant for the reader. Using “you” is a red flag here, and whenever you see that, odds are you're breaking that fourth wall and addressing the reader.

Tastes vary with any unusual device like this, but for me, it works best when it’s embraced and woven into the storytelling throughout as a strong narrator. Having only a few comments here and there don’t work as well because in between comments, it's easy to forget the narrator is talking to me and when they do, it startles me all over again. Of course, too many interruptions feels like a tour guide who won’t shut up--just tell me the dang history without the personal commentary!

A good example of this technique done well is Pseudonymous Bosch’s The Name of this Book Is Secret. The narrator makes it very clear right from the start that he’s telling you this tale as a warning.

Good.

Now I know I can trust you.

You're curious. You're brave. And you're not afraid to lead a life of crime.

But let's get something straight: if, despite my warning, you insist on reading this book, you can't hold me responsible for the consequences. 

He's speaking to the reader and knows it, so the narrator is present throughout the entire story as a narrator. He’s not a character in the book. The voice and opinions are clearly his as an outsider relaying events. What he says to the reader helps move the story along and becomes part of the narrative.

The Book Thief was another novel that worked for me for the same reasons. Death is the narrator and he’s telling the tale, adding his own thoughts at various times.

--Of course, an introduction.

A beginning.

Where are my manners?

I could introduce myself properly, but it's not necessary. 

Or later...

Some of you are most likely thinking that white is not really a color and all that tired sort of nonsense. Well, I'm here to tell you that it is.

He pops in with observations throughout the story, and ever goes as far as to change where the story is located and who the focus character is when he sees fit. The capricious nature of Death works for this and doesn't make you feel as though you're being yanked all over the story.

An example that didn’t work as well for me is Brandon Sanderson’s Alcatraz Versus the Evil Librarians. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a great book, (well-written, hysterical premise, fun characters), but the narrator was a character in the story who talked to the reader as he narrated his own life.

So there I was, tied to an altar made from outdated encyclopedias, about to get sacrificed to the dark powers by a cult of evil Librarians.

As you might imagine, that sort of situation can be quite disturbing. It does funny things to the brain to be in such danger--in fact, it often makes a person pause and reflect upon his life. If you've never faced such a situation, then you'll simply have to take my word. If, on the other hand, you have faced such a situation, then you are probably dead and aren't likely to be reading this.

He often reminded me that I was reading a book, because there were actual reminders about what he’d had already told me about.

Now, I warned you that I wasn't a good person.

With the interruptions I could never lose myself in the story, which was a real shame. It was just a style that didn't work for me.

While Bosch’s narrator was telling a story, Sanderson’s was commenting on the story he was living. That made all the difference to me in how intrusive it felt.

Breaking the fourth wall and addressing the reader can be a fun technique that gives a different tone and feel to a novel, but it can also go too far and become tedious. Make sure you find the right balance between narrator and annoying tour guide.

How do you feel about characters talking to the reader? What books have you enjoyed (or not) because of it? Any adult examples to share? 

Looking to improve your craft? Check out one of my books on writing: 

In-depth studies in my Skill Builders series include Understanding Conflict (And What It Really Means), and Understanding Show Don't Tell (And Really Getting It). My Foundations of Fiction series includes Plotting Your Novel: Ideas and Structure, a self-guided workshop for plotting a novel, and the companion Plotting Your Novel Workbook, and my Revising Your Novel: First Draft to Finished Draft series, with step-by-step guides to revising a novel. 

Janice Hardy is the award-winning author of the teen fantasy trilogy The Healing Wars, including The Shifter, Blue Fire, and Darkfall from Balzer+Bray/Harper Collins. The Shifter, was chosen for the 2014 list of "Ten Books All Young Georgians Should Read" from the Georgia Center for the Book. It was also shortlisted for the Waterstones Children's Book Prize (2011), and The Truman Award (2011). She also writes the Grace Harper urban fantasy series for adults under the name, J.T. Hardy.

She's the founder of Fiction University and has written multiple books on writing, including Understanding Show, Don't Tell (And Really Getting It), Plotting Your Novel: Ideas and Structure, and the Revising Your Novel: First Draft to Finished Draft series.

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