How the Setting Raises Tension in Your Novel

By Janice Hardy, @Janice_Hardy

Your characters’ world provides opportunities to create mood and raise the tension in your scenes.

Universal Studios' Halloween Horror Nights is a perfect example of how a setting can influence the people in it.

The park is decorated with haunted houses and scary set pieces, and costumed staff (some with chainsaws) lurk in the shadows to jump out at guests. One group is startled and they scream, which makes everyone around them nervous, and just when people start to relax, another staff member leaps out. People who normally wouldn't be startled tend to shriek, because the setting already has them on edge.

This isn’t a happy coincidence. These staff members are trained to target guests who typically scare the easiest, so they look for younger people (particular teens and women) in groups, because they scream the loudest, and screams are contagious.
 

Your setting is the “spooky background music” of your novel.

The smallest clue can alert readers that things aren't okay, tweaking the subconscious and making them as uneasy as your characters. Details that seem innocuous can set a foreboding tone and hint that something bad is coming, just like creepy music that plucks at the nerves during a scary movie.

(Here’s more with Three Ways to Add Tension to a Scene During Revisions)

A character’s environment affects how they feel while in that environment.

This is why walking through an empty parking lot in the middle of the day seems safe, while walking through the same lot at night feels risky. We don't notice noises during the day, but at night, every creak, every thump, is a possible threat.

Sunny and bright = safe, while dark and gloomy = unsafe—even if that’s far from true.

Say this parking lot is at your protagonist’s office, and Kevin’s been having issues with a woman at work. She's threatened him, but he thinks it's just professional rivalry and she doesn’t really plan to act on it. Yet on his way out one afternoon, she glares at him in a way that makes his skin crawl, and he wonders if he was wrong about her.

You can raise the tension in several ways:

If Kevin just worries a little about what might happen with this woman, you’ll get some low-level tension, but it probably won’t make readers too nervous.

If Kevin realizes he has a bigger problem than he thought, the tension rises and the glare means a bit more and readers will probably start wondering if the woman does indeed mean him harm.

If Kevin is already nervous and wondering if he misjudged his coworker, then think about what he’ll see and hear as he walks to his car in his nervous state of mind. Maybe you can:

• Toss in a strange noise that might be footsteps
• Add a shadow that shouldn't be there
• Mention a smell or sound that can't be identified, but seems familiar in some way

Make the setting scary in multiple small ways that someone already on their guard would notice.

The tension rises and suddenly, readers are tense, too, jumping along with your protagonist. They start wondering what the woman is about to do, and are waiting for her to do it.

This simple scene is no longer a boring trip to the car, but a potential moment for something horrible to befall a character readers care about.

(Here’s more with Whoa, That’s Tense. 3 Ways to Raise the Tension in Your Scenes)

Scaring people in the dark is easy, but it doesn't have to be dark to achieve this.

A bright and sunny day can be just as worrisome if the protagonist starts seeing trouble in every flower. It’s more about the contrast between what the character sees and how they feel that raises red flags and triggers a fight or flight response. It could be:

• The stranger who smiles a little too long
• The law officer whose uniform doesn't quite fit
• The same type of car seen in multiple locations

If a character is already nervous, then they’ll start seeing what’s around them in a whole new light. A much scarier light.

(Here’s more with Creating Story Tension: Rooms with an Unexpected View)

Choose the right details to evoke the right response.

While the right details can add to a scene's tension, the wrong ones can actually steal that tension.

Imagine a different protagonist vacationing in Savannah, GA. Layla’s staying at one of those restored Victorian mansions around the historic district. She's having dinner, when suddenly, zombies crash through the windows. As she's running through the house with killer zombies right behind her, she notices and describes the charming antique banisters and the lace curtains.

Does that make the scene feel scarier, or more like a tour by House and Garden?

Chances are it kills the tension, because the focus isn't on the fear or the getaway, it's on details that mean nothing to the reader or the character. Who notices curtains when they’re running for their life?

However...

You can have Layla notice those curtains if they show an aspect of her personality that's important. If you're going for humor, she might snarkily fret about how she’s going to get all that blood and guts out of the carved wooden banister. Or maybe:

• The zombies claw through the lace and she’s horrified by how easily they shred it
• The lace snags on her hands as she tries to use it as a rope, hindering her as she tries to flee the house
• She runs around the corner and gets tangled up in billowing curtains blowing into the hallway

If you truly feel you need to describe those lace curtains, you can find ways to do it that works with the scene.

(Here’s more with One, Two Three, Notice Me: The Rule of Three (And How it Helps Our Writing)

Take a closer look at your scenes and ask:

Can you increase the tension by using details that reflect your protagonist's mood? If they’re worried, look for things that reinforce that worry. If they’re scared, looked for details that typically cause fear. If they’re upset, look for elements in the setting that can push their buttons even further.

Can you change how the protagonist sees or uses a detail already there? Maybe they trip over a curb, or cut themselves on a broken piece of glass. That cool breeze might be a cold wind that makes them shiver. A child’s laughter could take on an eerie tone.

Are you killing the suspense with descriptions that lower the tension? Be particularly wary of detached descriptions of what you as the author know is there versus what the character sees. Make sure their emotional or mental state matches how they see their environment.

(Here’s more with Is Your Description Helping Your Story or Holding it Back?)

The setting details you describe go a long way to either raising your tension or stealing the scary right out of it.

You have to describe the setting anyway, so why not make the most of it? Let it help you create a more immersive world that affects your characters’ emotional states, as well as impeded their plot problems.

EXERCISE FOR YOU: Take five minutes and play with the setting details in one of your scenes. Think about the emotional state you want your character in, and how subtle (and not-so-subtle) change can better achieve that.

Have you ever read or seen a scene where the setting increased then tension? What about lessened it?

*Originally published April 2010. Last updated October 2022.

Find out more about setting and description in my book, Fixing Your Setting & Description Problems.

Go step-by-step through setting and description-related issues, such as weak world building, heavy infodumping, told prose, awkward stage direction, inconsistent tone and mood, and overwritten descriptions. Learn how to analyze your draft, spot any problems or weak areas, and fix those problems.

With clear and easy-to-understand examples, Fixing Your Setting & Description Problems offers five self-guided workshops that target the common issues that make readers stop reading. It will help you:

• Choose the right details to bring your setting and world to life
• Craft strong descriptions without overwriting
• Determine the right way to include information without infodumping
• Create compelling emotional layers that reflect the tone and mood of your scenes
• Fix awkward stage direction and unclear character actions

Fixing Setting & Description Problems starts every workshop with an analysis to pinpoint problem areas and offers multiple revision options in each area. You choose the options that best fit your writing process. It's an easy-to-follow guide to crafting immersive settings and worlds that draw readers into your story and keep them there.

Available in paperback and ebook formats.

Janice Hardy is the award-winning author of the teen fantasy trilogy The Healing Wars, including The Shifter, Blue Fire, and Darkfall from Balzer+Bray/Harper Collins. The Shifter, was chosen for the 2014 list of "Ten Books All Young Georgians Should Read" from the Georgia Center for the Book.

She also writes the Grace Harper urban fantasy series for adults under the name, J.T. Hardy.

When she's not writing novels, she's teaching other writers how to improve their craft. She's the founder of Fiction University and has written multiple books on writing.

Website | Facebook | Twitter | Pinterest | Goodreads | Amazon | Barnes & Noble | iTunes | Indie Bound