Sorry, Your Services are no Longer Required: Eliminating Characters from Your Novel

By Janice Hardy, @Janice_Hardy

This week's Refresher Friday takes another look at things to do when you have to cut a character from your novel.

It's not uncommon for the number of characters in a novel to grow as we write that novel. We discover scenes that need extra hands, or a walk-on role turns out to be a fantastic secondary character and gets more page time. Or we're writing a series, and after a few books, we realize the cast list has become unmanageable.

I ran into this while writing the third book in my fantasy trilogy, Darkfall. I had the main characters, the major supporting characters, old characters from book one, added characters from book two, and then all the new characters for book three. Suddenly, the scenes were all way too crowded.

I needed to do a little character pruning, but who got to stay and who had to go?

If you're facing too many characters and need to send some packing, here are a few tricks that worked for me.

Let an existing character do the work instead of a new character

If you find yourself creating a new character for a scene, check first to see if an existing character can do the job instead. Look as your smaller walk-on roles, which can often be fleshed out some to include the new tasks needed for the story. Perhaps what has to be done is a skill a larger character might have, or a problem they caused. Instead of adding a character, you can add a layer to someone else and deepen both the story and the character.

For example, my protagonist Nya encounters a character from book one early on in book three. This character is important because some plot events hinge on them. Later, Nya encounters another character who also played an important role. Problem was, Character One didn't really show up again and Character Two needed more page time to do the job effectively in the end. 

Since Character One was important for what they were, not who they were, it made sense to put Character Two into the earlier scene and cut Character One from the novel. I had to tweak the dialogue since these two characters didn't sound anything at all alike, but the events of the scene played out the same, just with a new person in that role. It was a great solution to a problem, and actually deepened the overall story by bringing Character Two's past into the novel earlier.

In Your Novel: Look at the reason that character is there and see if someone else can fill that role. Often, the who doesn't matter as much as the what. If your reasons for a character being there are general (and not specific to that character), you can likely accomplish the same thing by using an existing character.

(Here's more on determining if you have too many characters)

Reconnect a smaller character to the bigger picture

Sometimes you'll have a character you want to use, but they don't seem to do all that much in the story. You have reasons for wanting them in there (often dealing with backstory or world building), but they cause more problems than they solve. They feel unconnected to the story because they're unconnected to the plot.

There was a character from book one I wanted to reuse in book three. Every time I tried to insert them into a scene it felt like, "oh, and here's this other person over there." They were part of the cast, but they didn't do anything. I needed to find a way to reconnect them to the story in general and Nya (and thus the plot) in particular.

For Darkfall, I used the world mechanics to reconnect them to Nya. Since I had to show how the world and the magic worked, this character gave me a great opportunity to do that and get that character back into the story. The character was also walking backstory for previous books, so that gave me another opportunity to remind old readers and tell new readers the critical information they needed about the series.

In Your Novel: Look for characters from your protagonist's past that can help you explain or show an aspect of the story or world that is important, but feels awkward or forced when done with a new character. Characters with a past can also be useful to aid the current storyline and enhance the plot, especially if they bring trouble with them.

(Here's more on how much page time supporting characters need)

Show clingy characters the door

These are characters who have played roles in the past, and the logic of the story says they'd be in a particular scene, but there's just no graceful way to get them into the plot. They're in the way and might even hijack your plot.

For me, these were major characters' family members and people Nya had rescued. If they weren't there readers would notice, but every time I put them into a scene, the story went off track. My solution? I sent them away. I looked for plausible reasons why they had to leave, and was able to use that "sorry kid you gotta go" scene to enhance another aspect of the story and deepen one of the thematic layers. Family members leaving while a major character went off to do something very dangerous provided a touching and emotional moment to the story.


In Your Novel: Look for characters who are there because it feels like they have to be. There's a decent chance these characters irritate you, because you know they're mucking things up and you're trying to shove them in because of story logic (like the hero wouldn't cast off her faithful servant, but he's just too much of a hassle to deal with if he's always around). Look for ways to remove these characters from the story in a plausible way. Why wouldn't the protagonist want them around?

(Here's more on determining if that minor character can become more)

Get rid of characters you don't need

Cutting out characters is by far the easiest way to reduce your cast, but in many cases, it's not easy to do. Try making a list of every character in the novel, starting with the main characters, and moving down to the minor named walk-ons. Who doesn't need to be there? Maybe one of the minor named walk-ons can become "the server" instead of "Maria the waitress," or the conversation in the diner can be moved elsewhere where another person isn't needed.

Subplots are also a great place to look for unneeded characters, especially if you're doing some overhauling of the story itself. Kill a subplot and every unique character in that subplot can also go.

In Your Novel: Look at subplots your instincts are telling you might not be needed. Odds are these are subplots or scenes you like, and are actually good scenes, but aren't serving to the story (and you're doing back flips to keep them in because you really like them). They could even be scenes you strip down to the bare essentials and find homes for them with different characters.

(Here's more on fleshing out flat characters)

Large stories naturally accumulate a lot of characters. Streamlining the cast list can be tough, but you usually have much a much better story once you cut away the dead weight.

Does your current WIP have too many characters? 

Find out more about characters and point of view in my book, Fixing Your Character & Point-of-View Problems.

Go step-by-step through revising character and character-related issues, such as two-dimensional characters, inconsistent points of view, too-much backstory, stale dialogue, didactic internalization, and lack of voice. Learn how to analyze your draft, spot any problems or weak areas, and fix those problems.

With clear and easy-to-understand examples, Fixing Your Character & Point-of-View Problems offers five self-guided workshops that target the common issues that make readers stop reading. It will help you:

• Flesh out weak characters and build strong character arcs
• Find the right amount of backstory to enhance, not bog down, your story
• Determine the best point(s) of view and how to use them to your advantage
• Eliminate empty dialogue and rambling internalization
• Develop character voices and craft unique, individual characters 

Fixing Your Character & Point-of-View Problems starts every workshop with an analysis to pinpoint problem areas and offers multiple revision options in each area. You choose the options that best fit your writing process. It's an easy-to-follow guide to crafting compelling characters, solid points of view, and strong character voices readers will love.

Available in paperback and ebook formats.

Janice Hardy is the award-winning author of the teen fantasy trilogy The Healing Wars, including The Shifter, Blue Fire, and Darkfall from Balzer+Bray/Harper Collins. The Shifter, was chosen for the 2014 list of "Ten Books All Young Georgians Should Read" from the Georgia Center for the Book.

She also writes the Grace Harper urban fantasy series for adults under the name, J.T. Hardy.

When she's not writing novels, she's teaching other writers how to improve their craft. She's the founder of Fiction University and has written multiple books on writing.

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